COPING WITH GRIEF AND LOSS
By Reference Librarian Eunice Borrelli
At some point in their lives, everyone experiences grief of one kind or another. Grief is a response to the loss of something or someone, and even when it’s expected, it can knock us off our feet. Recently, there have been some violent events-shootings, vehicle accidents, stabbings-that have led to grief and loss for us as a community. Ongoing sources for grief include job loss, divorce and home foreclosure.
We usually think of grief as an emotional experience but it can also be physical, social, and psychological. We can’t always understand why things happen, but we can develop coping skills that help us heal.
Support groups are one way to get help during difficult times. The Capital Area District Library website offers a list of local resources which includes several specific to grief counseling: Ele’s Place (517.482.1315), Grief Recovery and Education Center (517.333.3636), Sparrow Hospice Support (517.364.1000), Sierra Rose Farms – Healing Hearts with Horses (517.669.0057) and Widowed Persons Group (517.339.4675). These groups provide direct support and can also refer you to another agency or service.
Another good resource might be your place of worship. Check to see if your congregation offers any kind of support group, counseling or referral assistance.
Many books have been written on the topics of grief and loss. Our library catalog includes 37 subject areas, such as grief in children, grief in men, psychological aspects, grief in fiction, grief in women, grief therapy. Within these areas, we offer almost 500 different titles.
If you need help narrowing down the list, a grief support center in Ohio called the Fernside Resource Center (www.fernside.org) has developed a list of suggested books for both adults and children. You’ll find these titles at CADL: A Grief Like No Other: Surviving the violent death of someone you love by Kathleen O’Hara; No Time for Goodbyes: Coping with sorrow, anger and injustice after a tragic death by Janice Harris Lord; and A Terrible Thing Happened by M. Holmes.
Eleven more titles are available through CADL’s membership to MeL, the Michigan Library interloan system. You can place holds on these books and have them delivered to the CADL location of your choice. Find them by searching the MeL catalog at www.mel.org, or by asking staff at any CADL location. Titles include: The Forgiving Place: Choosing peace after violent trauma by Richard R. Gayton; What to do When the Police Leave: A guide to the first days of traumatic loss; When a Child has been Murdered: Ways you can help the grieving parents by Bonnie Hunt Conrad; The Boy Who Sat by the Window: Helping children cope with violence by Chris Loftis; and Children Also Grieve: Talking about death and healing by Linda Goldman.
Finally, a number of online resources are available for those struggling with grief and loss. The WebMD site offers readings and “action sets” that suggest steps for helping a child, teen or an older person with grieving. Visit www.WebMD.com and type “grief and grieving” in the search box. The Mayo Clinic provides a variety of articles on grieving different types of loss. Find them by visiting www.MayoClinic.com and typing “grief” in the search box. MedlinePlus, a service of the U.S. National Library of Medicine, offers articles at www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus. Find them by typing “grief” in the search box. This site also offers links to support groups for the loss of a child or a spouse.
For assistance with any of these suggestions, please contact the staff at your local CADL branch, or the CADL Reference Department. We are located at 401 S. Capitol Avenue in Lansing and can be reached at 571.367.6346 or by e-mail at reference@cadl.org.
This was printed in the August 29, 2010 – September 11, 2010 edition
