By Marvin Cato
I don’t know about you but I’m tired of hearing about all of the young people we’re losing due to an escalation in violence. We all know that certain lifestyles boast the ability to do great bodily harm and even take a life as if it’s a badge of honor to have a violent reputation and be feared. I ask the question why? What can we do about it? What happened to settling our differences with good old fashion reasoning, a healthy and spirited debate, or even a raging argument where tempers flare and points are made but no one dies because of a disagreement?
Don’t get me wrong I’m not naïve. I’ve six decades of seniority on this planet and I grew up in streets of Detroit where I’ve been on my own since I was fifteen years old. I’ve been through the Foster Care System, the Juvenile Justice System, the Street Life System, the Criminal Justice System, the University System, and the world of work System.
Somehow after six decades I thought we would be at a better and more humane place by now. After experiencing the sixties, and the civil rights and human rights movements I had visions of the world being a fair and just place in the twenty first century. Then the bottom fell out, the economy tanked, jobs are leaving the country, the cost of living quadrupled, the unemployment rate skyrocketed, and forty six million people don’t have health insurance, and everyone is looking for someone to blame.
So in the words of former president Ronald Reagan, “Here we go again”. And to quote Rodney King “Can’t we all just get along”. Well can we? To put it bluntly the atmosphere is ripe for violence because our society is suffering and if you can’t fight city hall who do you fight? You guessed it we fight each other because we have access to each other. And every little petty disagreement becomes an opportunity to assert our selves through violence.
We all want the best for ourselves, our families, our communities and our nation. When you get right down to it we are all more alike than we are different, which means there is a bridge of understanding that we all share that can lead us from indifference to understanding, and caring, and sharing. If we believe this then we have to model it, as adults we have to walk the talk, because even more than our youth hear us, they see us, and if our behavior doesn’t match what we say then we lose credibility with each other, but more importantly with the youth who are listening and watching.
We can’t always control our circumstances but we can control our attitude. I wish things were a lot better for me economically, but I understand what my reality is, and it’s my resolve to make the best of each day, to do my best, to give my best, to learn from today so that tomorrow will be better because I have a purpose and a plan. But most importantly if things don’t go my way I’ll not blame the obstacle or try to destroy it, I’ll understand it so I can overcome it and eliminate it. I know that anger is fuel for my enemies to control me, just as I know that they are confounded by my calm and amazed by my strategies to succeed even as they try to block me.
My advantage is they underestimate me, and while they attempt to play on my emotions I am devising intellectual and logic proof solutions. But most of all I have a plan and I am always focused on my goal. Thus no matter what, the winner is me.
Let’s stop the violence and start building each other up, supporting each other even when we need help ourselves. When I am coaching I have a formula that I use, it is “See, Believe, Do”.
I’d like to leave you with those words.
See means visualize your dreams, you can never accomplish anything that you can’t see. If you don’t know what your dream looks like how will you recognize it when it happens?
Believe means two things:
(1) Believe you can accomplish your dreams, and
(2) believe that you deserve your dreams. If you don’t believe that you have what it takes to accomplish your dreams, and you don’t believe that you are deserving, then your dreams are just wishful thinking. Wishes are just fantasy but dreams are real!!!
Do means action. Dreams require action to be fulfilled. If you know what you want, and know what it takes to get it, then all you need is a plan and a commitment to action.
Nothing will happen unless you first do something!!!
Energy is energy, you’re the one that decides if it is negative or positive, if it will be used for violence or healing. Choose wisely.
Marvin Cato is a community activist.
This was printed in the November 18, 2012 – December 1, 2012 Edition
