By Marvin Cato
TNCP CAN
I am an only child and I grew up in the foster care system and bounced from place to place. When I look back on my life, I realize that I am a statistical anomaly. Given all of the obstacles that I had to overcome in my life, social scientist would say that I should be dead or in prison for the rest of my life. So why am I still alive, as a working professional with a graduate level education, a father, grandfather, and yes even a great grandfather. The answer is because of the men in my life.
I consider myself fortunate that I paid attention to what was going on around me as I grew up in the sixties. I did not have a big brother to take me under his wing, nor did I have a mentor who recognized my talents and gifts and spoke into my life and guided me down the right path. But what I did have was the voices of brilliant and courageous men such as Mohamed Ali, Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., and Malcolm X who fought against the odds for their principles, values, and beliefs, for social justice and the rights of all people, especially the disenfranchised and people of color. Since I did not have real life mentors I embraced them and proclaimed them as my mentors.
I am still alive today because I made a decision at the cross roads of my life to believe these men and do something with my life. I did not want to be them but they inspired me to be the best Marvin that I can be. And in order for me to be the best me I had to invest in myself, which meant deciding what I wanted to do with my life and investing the time and education to help me reach my goals. As I reach my goals I replace them with new goals because there is always more to learn, more to do, and more improvements on myself that I can make.
I did not even know these men personally so I studied them and I leaned from their words of encouragement and by the example of the life they lived. I was in my late twenties when I decided to go the college and leave the street life in my past. I shudder to think of the life I would have now if I had a real life mentor that mentored me and guided my path as a boy to adulthood. If a distant mentor can impact the life of someone such as myself imagine what we can do as men who speak directly into the lives of the young men that we know in our family, and in our community. Imagine!
I know longer take my presence for-granted because I have an adult daughter and five grand kids that look up to me. I am the only college educated professional black man that they know personally. I didn’t know the power of that until I noticed that just my presence had an impact on the behavior and goals and aspirations of my grand kids. My grandsons and my granddaughters. They are a part of my bloodline and through me they can see the possibilities for their own future. Not because of anything special that I did or do, but because I am in their lives and show them that I love them.
Men our presence can make a big difference in the lives of our male and female offspring, and to the youth in our community. How will our young boys grow to be men if we do not show them what a man is? How will our young ladies know what to look for in a man if we do not model it for them? If we do not show our youth how to reason and solve problems through their intellect they will result to violence because that is what they see. And as we see through the efforts of The New Citizens Press Community Action Network Inc. (TNCP CAN) violence has a multiplication effect. Who knows what a difference any one of us can make, so when a life is lost so is the potential of all the good and greatness that person could have contributed to the world. Equally so the person who takes a life also looses their opportunity for greatness because their life is lost to the criminal justice system. Also the families of both people are impacted, so is their community and everyone that knew them. I don’t have all the answers to stop the violence in our communities, but what I do know is that strong purposeful, courageous, and committed men who are present in the lives of our young people can make a powerful difference.
Marvin Cato is a community activist. He is also a board member of The New Citizens Press Community Action Network Inc. (TNCP CAN).
This was printed in the December 16, 2012 – December 29, 2012 Edition
