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Nu Resolution 6-10

By Joe Walker

“If Bozo battled other clowns, would kids play cards in the middle of his squabble?”

Pokemon is stupid. Yu-Gi-Oh is worse. Children like them both. Parents allow this in their homes.

Whatever happened to kids shows that taught lessons? Okay, Thundercats was a little violent. Bozo The Clown fired belittling insults at his sidekick, Cookie. G.I. Joe had a few war-like-scenes. C.O.P.S. stylized inner city organized crime. Someone tried to kill Jem every episode so they could sell more records. But every one of those cartoons taught a lesson at the end, gave some advice through the episode’s events; don’t do drugs, practice safe behaviors, don’t break the law, don’t give in to peer pressure, punishment occurs if you break the rules. They’d also give a public service announcement before the closing credits. Didn’t you know that? You didn’t? Well, now you know – and knowing is half the battle!

What do children learn from Pokemon? Greed. You gotta catch them all. You MUST collect every Pokemon ever created. If someone has a Pokemon that you want, then fight the person for it. Beat them up and take it. I remember reading how parents complained about the variety of G.I. Joe action figures that were being produced. Now look at Pokemon; they’ve got thousands of trading cards you’re supposed to collect, along with video games that introduce new Pokemon you’re encouraged to acquire.

Kids need education in their entertainment, but it seems no one cares to keep it there anymore. Once Dora and Blue’s Clues aren’t cool anymore, Pokemon steps in. What if Bozo The Clown had a battle card game? You’d have to collect all their poses without getting the Pie-In-The-Face card. Once you have them all you’d get a lifetime of attempts to win the Grand … Prize … Game! You know you’d lose every time, but you’d learn to not give up. And knowing is half the battle!

New Resolution #11: Teach kids to play card games like I Declare War; Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh are just bozos.